Have you ever been told that you shouldn’t wear something because of your body size or shape? I know I have, on more than one occasion! Horizontal stripes, bikinis, heels and tight clothing, just to name a few.
I am a Design and Visual Arts graduate from Unitec, and for my final year project I began photographing women who ignore the “fashion rules” and wear what they want.
If you’re wanting to be part of this project, please leave me a comment below letting me know where in New Zealand you’re from. I am hoping to travel more with this project (when I can find the funding for it), so hopefully I will make it to a town near you soon. Make sure you’re subscribed to my blog, and I will update here with my travel plans.
Please also let me know what things you’ve read/heard that fat/curvy/plus size women “should not wear” in the comments below!
If you have any questions about the project, please feel free to get in touch via my contact page. Please share this with your friends – I’d love all the input I can get!
UPDATE: Thanks to everyone for all of your support! This project is ongoing – make sure you’re subscribed to my newsletter to keep up to date with new shoot locations and dates
Is this project still running?
It sure is Cj! You can check out the recent photo shoots that I have done here. I announce dates as I know my travel plans, so if you want to stay up to date with those, make sure you’re subscribed to my newsletter xo
I am from the Manawatu! I have been told not to wear pretty much everything I have or do wear, singlets, tights, stockings, jeans, shorts, tshirts, dresses shorter than my ankles, make-up. I was bulled at school so I now have a freer tongue if people are rude to me, I don’t think it is anyone’s right to put down anyone else for what ever the reason weight, looks, colour etc EVERYONE has the right to be themselves. I dress in what I think looks good on me. The best thing anyone can wear is their smile and no one should be able to take that off them.
Hi Meagan. This is such a cool project. I hate caring about whats appropriate for fat women. I wear horizontal stripes and I think they look great, and I wear skinny jeans, and sleeveless tops too!! If you’re still doing this, I’d love to be involved.
Hi Meagan, a friend of mine linked me to this and I’d be really keen to participate if you’re still shooting . I live in Wellington and I think this is an excellent project!
Looking forward to meeting you next month Tegan! xo
I soooooo want to be apart of this! ive always been ashamed of being a big girl but im starting to realize that i can be sexy too. Thank god for places like city chic (although it would be nice to be able to afford it)
I live in Napier Hawkes Bay and i am a visual art and design graduate myself. I love what you are doing and i hope i can be apart of it,
one weird thing ive heard is people always say that black is slimming but ive been told that it doesnt work on fat chics coz were already fat…?
Love, Rainbows and cookies
Pinky Cowan
xoxo
Hey Pinky! I’m hoping to be able to travel down your way sometime next year, so keep an eye on my blog to stay up to date with my travel plans!
And I’ve heard that too – weird that there are so many conflicting “rules”. I guess we’ll just have to ignore them huh? 😉
xM
I would love to be a part of your project!! I live in Raglan but travel in to Hamilton regularly, I will check back in with your blog for travel updates and I hope that I can be a part of this project as I think it would do wonders for my confidence and hopefully inspire other woman to be confident in their own skin (stretch marks and all!!).
I hate that “big girls” clothes stores tend to provide loose fitting, unflattering clothes.. Since when did big girl = ENORMOUS pattern?? And I HATE the “you’re pretty.. for a fat girl” comments from family and friends that think that is some how a compliment!
City Chic is the new love of my life and although it costs a pretty penny (or 100…) it is well worth the confidence i have gained in the last year 🙂
Amazing job you are doing Meagan! Looking forward to whats to come! x
I’m Jess, from Auckland. I’m constantly being told not to wear spots, horizontal stripe, patterns or bold colours. White makes fat girls look fatter so I’m told, no short skirts nothing sleeveless. I would love to be apart of this project!!
Hey Jess, thanks for posting! I’m going to start shooting again next year so keep an eye on my blog for announcements about shoot dates x
Hey, I am sooooo keen to be part of this amazing project – I am so over hearing the phrase “You are so pretty, if only you weren’t so big”. If only those people knew how soul destroying it is to hear those words. Whenever I go to the doctor now often the diagnosis is my weight, so no tests are performed which really leaves me confused and frustrated. I’m a good size 20/22.
I love your project and what it is doing for us big girls of society. My partner loves the big me, and wouldn’t have me any other way. We are beautiful too!!!
I would LOVE to be part of your project – I too are in Palmerston North 🙂 so please come photograph all us pretties down here, your a real inspiration.
xx
Oh man, if I had a dollar for every time I’d heard that! How fricken rude. I’m definitely planning to come to Palmy, keep an eye out here for dates as I have them.
Also, if your doctor blames everything on your weight and doesn’t bother doing any tests then they’re not doing their job properly. If you feel confident doing so, call them out on it with something like “how would you treat a slim person who presented with the same symptoms?”. Otherwise, find yourself a new doctor – if your current one is ignoring whatever is wrong with you and just says “it’s because you’re fat, you need to lose weight”, they are doing you a disservice and could be missing something important! I had the same problem with a doctor, so I changed to someone who is super amazing and actually does her job properly. Good luck!
xM
Hi Meagan! I have only just heard about you and your blog – As well as the photography project your wanting to do! I’m a 28 year old size 18 female in a wheelchair who for years has been told countless times “Don’t do this, Don’t do that” Or “Don’t wear this, Hell don’t wear that!” “Lose some weight, your too damn heavy!” Thank you for bringing this subject to everyone’s attention! If you are ever in Palmerston North – I would LOVE to be a part of this, or even just to MEET you! – Screw what people say, Even fat girls rock! xxx
Hi Kelly, I have received so many requests to come to Palmy that I absolutely must come! Keep an eye on my blog for travel dates xM
I think one of the biggest problems until recently has been the lack of stylish clothing in plus sizes, I use to struggle to find anything sexy or gorgeous but in the last few years with city chic etc it has begun to improve. The price of clothing is also an issue, there are some great plus size shops but they are so expensive compared to glassons etc! we need a clothing revolution too so that we can continue to look good but not at huge expense. I am also in Palmy so seems like you could easily get a crew of us together to photoshoot.
I agree! I get a lot of my stuff from overseas because NZ isn’t great in terms of the fashion/affordability balance in plus sizes. I’m doing a post about great places to shop soon, hopefully that will help. Am also working on said clothing revolution! Palmy is definitely on my list 😀
Hi!
I know you have updated to say you are taking a break over summer but I was wondering if you had any girls rocking their beautiful bodies in wedding dresses?
I am getting married the week before Xmas in Wellington and I am a curvy girl repping the cause in not one but two plus size wedding dresses. I would love to share my photos with your project or even have you take your own.
Just putting it out there.
I would love to hear from you.
X Jazz
Hi Jazz,
Ooh, not long to go now, how exciting! I don’t have anyone in a wedding dress just yet but would love to photograph you when I come down (hopefully) next year! Keep an eye on my blog, as I’ll be announcing my travel dates on here when I know them
xM
I agree with Jazz! Where’s the beautiful curvy ladies in wedding dresses? I am engaged and it is next to impossible to find examples of plus size woman in their wedding get up!
I haven’t had the chance to photograph anyone in bridalwear yet, but here are my gorgeous friends Rachel, Katie from SpijkerKat’s Closet, and Melissa from Suger Coat It in their wedding dresses 😀
Hey Megan,
I saw this on stuff and I cried. All my life I have been told how disgusting I am.. I fall into all the “bad” sterotypes.. Fat, poor, curly frizzy hair, glasses, solo mother, criminal family and all the other things that people like to judge! Haha I’ve also been noticing it a whole lot more now that i am pregnant for the second time. I’m 21 weeks pregnant and one of the bosses asked if i wa having twins because I’m so large..
You my dear as many of these people have said are an inspiration of confidence, I need to build mine up and I would love to be apart of your project. I would love the ability to help you in your project, flip the bird at society, rejoice in the fact that even thought I’m fat, i’m still a babe. I’m based in Wellington so if you manage to get down here or in the general region I would love to meet up.
Thanks in advance.
xx
Hi Alma,
Thanks for your message! I will definitely be posting my travel plans on my blog, so make sure you’re subscribed. Wellington is on my list of places to travel to, so hopefully I will get to see you next year 😀
Congratulations on your pregnancy, I hope you enjoy every moment of it.
xM
Hi there my name is Sheilena Mcdonnell I am a size 24-26 and am very unhappy with the way I look. Have tried all the diets , pills , shakes and poushions you could possibly think of but no success. … I am a mother of 4 beautiful children oldest being 17 youngest being 11 months, I want them to see me happy with myself but most of the time I am tired and depressed because of my weight so I am in bed to hide from the world
Hi Sheilena,
I’m glad you found my blog, hopefully the ladies I feature and I can help you out with some super body positive vibes. I recommend that you read Dr Linda Bacon’s book Health at Every Size, it really made me stop and think about how I was looking at my weight, my body and my health, and look at the diets etc. that I’d tried without success and understand why they didn’t work. I also recommend having a chat to your doctor and mentioning that you’ve been feeling depressed, hopefully they will be able to offer you some help!
xM
Hi!! You are such a inspiration well done!! I to am a plus size girl, and I never used to love my body, but 8 years ago, I met my husband who always tells me how beautiful I am and how lucky HE IS to have me! 2 Years ago I did a photo shoot for a friend who was starting out in photography, I was blown away when I seen the pics….. I seen myself in a whole new way, I really was beautiful. The pics where in lingerie and some topless!!! Eeeeeeekkkkkk something I NEVER thought I would do, but I did and I’m so happy I did! She posted some pics on her photography page and I was given some very positive/ lovely feedback. A lot of woman where inspired by me to get pics of themselves done, and it also made them feel like i did. Thanks for your page I will continue to read! xx
I’m in the upper plus size range, and I’ve heard and been told “Don’t wear dresses, it’s no good on you larger girls”, “don’t let your skin show, it’s better kept hidden”, “You can’t wear shorts with your legs”, “horizontal stripes are just going to make you look even bigger”, “less is more”. I’ve also had extended family comment such things as, “You must be on a lot of medication, you better watch out, you’ll have yourself a stroke!” (thanks… but I don’t take *any* medication, and I’m ridiculously healthy), and the number one comment I’ve heard which is not exclusive to fashion, but it is to being a plus size girl would have to be… “You’d look so pretty if you just lost the weight”. If I had a dollar for every time I heard that one, oooooooh. I could retire by the age of 30. Despite my size, I keep my dress sense acknowledging of my curves and not attempting to disguise anything. I am who I am, and I can still look fabulous and presentable. My jobs have consisted mostly of administration/reception and I’m not ashamed to be seen. Glamour and style isn’t defined by the clothes that you wear, but by how you wear the clothes! 🙂
I live in Palmerston North, and if you happen to be travelling this direction I would love to catch up with you and be a part of your project! I think what you’re doing is brilliant, and I salute you! 🙂
Oh man, the amount of times I’ve heard “You’d look so pretty if you just lost the weight”! Pfffft we are pretty now, dang it! Good on you for not putting up with people’s crap Vanessa. I look forward to meeting you when I come down to Palmy – make sure you’re subscribed to my blog, and I will announce my travel plans on here xM
Hi, Megan! I am in Palmerston North and would love to be involved when you get restarted. Some things I’ve found fat girls are told they have no business wearing: a smile, an attitude, any trace of one’s last meal or snack, someone else’s sexy naked body, their own skin without a tonne of makeup to prove they take pride in their appearance– yes, and colours, patterns, pastels, short sleeves… To be honest, I obey many of these, but not the ones I like to disobey, and everyone should have the same freedom.
From Kat:
“I’ve been told that my tops are too low cut (the same top on a woman with less breast doesn’t seem to be an issue), “Girls of your shape can’t really pull off that slimmer jean look”, “you can’t show that much skin”, “do you have a cardi to wear with that?”
We shouldn’t wear stripes, bodycon dresses,silks or satins, bulky knits, cowl necks, brights,3/4 tights, short skirts, pencil skirts, clothing that isn’t a muumuu or anything with a hint of style- basically put on a sack and like it!”
From Angelina in Wellington:
“I have heard that some clothes are divided into fat and normal categories. The ones in the fat catagories would be more like sack like and have boring designs.
I heard that fat girls could not wear jeans until I bought my first pair at 20 (I’m 24) after I heard those comments I never expected the shop to have a size 16”
Hi all.
Fat girls shouldn’t wear shorts. And I didn’t. I didn’t own a single pair of shorts after my childhood until last August.
Last year I began training to skate with Auckland’s Pirate City Rollers and though I’m absurdly fit now, I also have a size 20 butt and thunder thighs, the colour of milk and the texture of cottage cheese. I run around in hot pants all the time now, and although I still get shockingly negative comments, I’ve never been happier than when I realized I was dressing for me, not others!
I wear what makes me feel pretty and comfortable now!
Hurray for hot pants!
I am a NSO with SCRR, and did freshies for a while, hot pants and fishnets were very empowering.
This is awesome, I love wearing pin up style stuff, I wear flat shoes cos they are practical with 4 kids. Bright colours are fab as are patterns. I dress for me not the rest of the world and if that means wearing my doc boots and a pinup dress then I will do it.
This project sounds awesome!! I’m not in Auckland, I’m in Hamilton, but if you are ever travelling around I would love to be a part of it 🙂 I used to be a size 12 up until my 20’s and I coped a lot of flack for my weight from my family and some friend’s. People seem to think it’s their job to tell you what to eat and how to live. I have had so many relationships destroyed by men who think I am embarrassing to be seen with because of my weight. Luckily I found a woman (!) who loves me for who I am and now I consider myself, at a size 22, to be a stylish beautiful woman. Hope to hear from you 🙂
Izzy x
Hey Izzy,
Thanks! I’ve travelled down to Hamilton to photograph a couple of ladies already, and I am hoping to travel more with this project (when I can find the funding for it). Make sure you’re subscribed to my blog, and I will update here with my travel plans.
xM
What size do you consider ‘plus sized’ for the context of this project?
Hi Corva,
As stated in this post, I’m looking for women size 16+ for my project.
xM
I sent this in an email but I though I’d comment it too!
I’m so excited to read this. You have no idea. I have been over weight my whole life and all through high school thought “I’ll be beautiful when I lose x amt of weight.” When I got to college I had a “bullshit” moment when I realized that I’m beautiful no matter what. So I changed the way I dressed and I owned me! I’m not saying it all went away or that I don’t still have days (we’re women, let’s face it those days will always plague us), but I love myself and my style. Even if “they” tell me not to wear skinny jeans 😉
Thanks for sharing that Beth Ann, and good on you for not taking crap about your body! High five to you, lady!
xM
I’ve heard that fat girls shouldn’t “try to be” sexy at all. I’ve been ridiculed at the beach for showing my legs, AT THE BEACH! Done with that. I’m making my own rules from now on!
Good on you Bianca! That sounds ridiculous, and I’m so glad you’re making your own rules x
Priscilla says, “I was constantly told growing up that bigger girls shouldn’t wear bright colors, animal print, striped clothing, leggings, shorts or singlet tops. It has taken me a while but I can now finally say that I am perfectly comfortable with my body and LOVE rocking all of the things that I was told I should never wear.”
High five! Good on you Priscilla!
x
Annamarie says, “My mother always told me when I was growing up that I shouldn’t wear satin, especially not on my bust, because it ‘made bigger girls look bosomy’. I was a fairly normal-sized pre-teen, just early to adolescence, so we’re talking maybe a C-cup on a size-10 girl. It didn’t help that my family was heavily involved in ballroom dancing, where, you guessed it, satin was hard to avoid.
So as an adult, whether a size 12 or 20 (and I’ve been up and down the numbers a couple of times so far), I’ve never even gone near satin, never even tried it on. I’ve never owned a satin blouse, or even a camisole.
I still firmly believe that satin is not for the likes of me.”
I feel like a shopping trip might be on the cards, Annamarie! If whatever you’re wearing is well cut and fits properly, satin will look amazing on you!
Amber says, “I like to dress really rockabilly which means pencil skirts or poofy skirts! Pencil skirts mean my legs and my belly are super obvious and I was once told that my favourite poofy dress made me look like my butt was ten times bigger than it is… I think so many people think you need to look like Dita Von Teese to rock rockabilly.”
Thanks to Amber for being the first person to step in front of my camera for this project!
Rachel says, “Stripes, skinny jeans, short skirts, bodycon dresses, pencil dresses, sleeveless ANYTHING”.
It looks like quite a few of the same themes are coming through here!
Lily says, “I’m not only larger than most girls, but I also have rather large boobs and this causes me all sorts of issues. The kind of tops that would be considered ‘cute’ on smaller girls always get me filthy looks. “You’re showing too much cleavage” and “That top is trashy” are common when I’m merely wearing a plain singlet top.It would be nice to just wear clothes that I think are cute or pretty without being judged because of my belly or my boobs.”
I hear ya, Lily! I’m the same, and as someone who doesn’t like wearing high collared clothing I get a lot of stick about my cleavage!
Deb says, “Don’t wear: wide stripes but narrow stripes can be flattering ….. tight clothing as it will show your rolls/bumps/lumps ….. loose, shapeless clothing as it will look like you’re wearing a tent ….. flat shoes with a shorter dress/skirt as you will look frumpy and your legs will look like stumps ….. mini skirts as you will look really wide ….. short puffy sleeves as you will look even wider …..”
Sounds like my whole wardrobe 😉
Annette (who I can’t email back because she apparently gave me the wrong email address) says “We should only wear A Line skirts because they’re flattering! I love pencil skirts”.
Me too Annette! Equal love for all skirt styles!
Dawn says “Awesome project! I am in the clothing business and am daily asked for my opinion, all I can say is confidence is the only rule, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Keep in touch with your progress!”
Thanks Dawn, will do!
Thanks to Sheri, who said:
“I know I was told I shouldn’t wear white because of my size/shape, that I look three times my size in white and it’s designed for the “smaller” people. Lady said that to me once while I was trying on a white skirt to wear at the beach… I liked the skirt a lot too, but was made to feel like I’d look like a beached whale, so I ended up not getting it at the time.”
Thanks to Abby for her response:
“Horizontal stripes, skinny jeans, sleeveless tops, strapless bras, things tight around the hips, things not accentuating the waist, unstructured clothing ie: only wear tailored clothes, backless tops/dresses, only wear black/dont wear black, small print patterns, dont have long hair past your shoulders… I could go on :)”