An attitude of gratitude

At the end of every day, before I go to sleep, I like to lie there and think about the things that I am grateful for. This act of practising gratitude is one that has helped me to change my outlook on life – it’s made me more positive, it’s helped me cope better when times are tough (and trust me, some times have been really tough lately!) and changed the way that I deal with everything from my business to my relationships.

A few years ago, I had a very negative attitude about … well, pretty much everything. If something wasn’t going right for me, I was down about absolutely everything. I don’t know that it was a conscious decision, but I seemed to gravitate towards situations and people who were negative and not good for me because hey, who doesn’t love a good whinge, right? While there is nothing wrong with having the occasional vent, I didn’t want to be one of those people who was all “woe is me” all the time. I was playing the victim and wallowing in my own negativity.

One of my friends Tarryne (who is now a fabulous coach based in Texas) encouraged me to try looking at things more positively and to develop an attitude of gratitude. To write down three good things that had happened every day. She didn’t tell me it was because I was a major drag (although I’m sure I was!), she just casually mentioned it was something she did, and said I should give it a go. And so I did. Surely it couldn’t be all that difficult to name three good things every day, right?

Well actually, it was a lot harder than I thought it would be. When you have a negative self image and you’re not feeling great about yourself,  sometimes it can be bloody hard to appreciate even the little things in life. I committed to doing it for 100 days, and I’ve got to say, it’s a good thing I hated admitting failure, because that meant I pushed myself to keep going even when I was scraping the bottom of the barrel with things like “I patted a dog today”*.

Writing down those three good things at the end of every day meant that I was reflecting on how my day went. When things weren’t going well, it helped me to see that if I wanted things to be better, I needed to make changes! And change I did. The biggest change I made was my own outlook on life. I looked for the positive parts of my day, the things that made me happy. I used to struggle to think of three things and now I can list many many more, and that makes me feel great.

I’ve changed how I write down my three good things. In the beginning it was in the notes on my phone and I posted them online. For a while I wrote them on post it notes and stuck them up around my office, but that ended up being not so practical. I counted them in my head for a while, and have even written them on random pieces of paper. Recently I thought it would be a good idea to have them all together in a place that didn’t take up too much space but where I could look back over them if I was ever feeling down (I live with bipolar disorder and anxiety so that is something that happens occasionally), so now I’ve got a gratitude journal. I’m working on remembering to write things down.

I try to make the time to sit down every night (bonus points if I have a cup of tea in hand) and write down the highlights of my day. Because if I’m honest, I have a lot to be grateful for.

Today, I am grateful for red lipstick that makes me feel powerful; my good friend Rhiannon and finally being able to walk without crutches and do my own grocery shopping today!

Those are three things I’m grateful for today and now I want to put the challenge out to you – I would love for you to share three good things from your day in the comments below or on Instagram. If you want to keep going and share them on Instagram regularly, use the hashtag #thisisgratitude – I’d love to see what makes your day awesome!

Do you keep a gratitude journal?

* Looking back now, I realise that patting a dog is always going to be a highlight for me because dogs are awesome. I actually wish I’d patted a dog today.